How do you live in and with this world, courageously?

Photo Credit: Author’s image bank

This first month of the 2024 is at its end and with it we say goodbye to family, friends, our jobs, children going off to school and perhaps partners starting something new, elsewhere. We may try to hold close to a love that no longer thrives or a family member who has passed on. This is may be hardest. 

But … January allows us to see the year ahead, examine where we are and perhaps grieve that which we can no longer enjoy. We also examine our past and take from it all that is good whilst we recognize those aspects of our lives over which we have had no control. 

In my case, loss allows me to remember what I had at one point in my life and look back with gratitude that I can still continue to rise, in the words of Maya Angelou. Loss also brings to mind that which was denied, removed, wrenched from our pasts; a homeland, a language, an extended family, a cultural heritage and a sense of belonging to something bigger than oneself.  

As an educator, I feel anger and compassion at the huge loss to the world and future schools and colleges of both Antoinette (Bonnie) Candia-Bailey in the USA and Ruth Perry in the UK. They died as a result of harassment, bullying, institutional racism, unfair reporting and inflammatory language used against them. Two women in high pressured positions, doing the absolute best they could. Their families and friends, together with our profession, have suffered as a result of this loss of life. There are many more like Bonnie and Ruth who go unheard and un-reported.

Loss also offers the possibility to rebuild ourselves as we keep our loss close, wherever that may be and whatever brings us sadness. There will be a time when there is enough strength and courage to face it, to examine it, to take action and to keep moving forward. 

I have come to understand the meaning of loss for me in that I move on with it, drawing on the strength of those who support me, to confront my loss and understand its meaning for me and those I love and care about. 

As a soft-spoken, wise mother, Jessie (1921-2014) showed me that loss does not go away, we cannot hide from it. When we try, it comes looking for us – sometimes in moments in our lives when we least expect. We are hard-wired to face absence. We did so at birth as we all left the security of a warm nurturing environment to face this world; to live in it and with it. We can choose to grieve, but we cannot choose loss. We can, however, take strength from the courage we have gained from our lives lived so far.  

As we move into the rest of the year, even when we face a seemingly bleak expanse before us, there are a myriad of choices we make every day that make the difference. I believe we have the strength and the courage to move forward.

How will you live in and with this world, courageously? 

If you can, do support my Luxembourg to Mpaka Kamhlaba Challenge to provide a UWC education at Waterford Kamhlaba for a refugee from the Republic of the Congo. Thanks!

From Luxembourg to Mpaka